a Time for Everything

Aren't you glad it's Thursday?

2011-09-29T18:36:00.003-04:00

Around the house..there are lots and lots of boxes of Kleenex. After avoiding the cold germs the menfolk have been toting around the past few weeks, I have finally succumbed. And for some odd reason, the cold medicine I have reluctantly been taking seems to rev up my mind rather than put me to sleep. At least at night. =)

Outside...the temperature is gloriously cool in the mornings! Even as I sit here this evening, the windows are open and there's a slight cool breeze blowing through the house. The trees are being dabbed with fall colors, a little more each day. (and for the moment, the leaves are hanging on for dear life!)

I am thankful for...more than I can say. A God who heals. My brother's pathology report came back cancer free. A God who holds us close and is faithful. My father's health is declining rather rapidly at the moment. We are hoping for healing for him but he has an appointment at the cancer center here on Monday. At this point, we have no real idea what we are battling but daddy is very discouraged and pained.

Some highlights of the week...we had our second Bible study meeting Tuesday night. It was wonderful! We are doing Priscilla Shirer's Jonah this time around and it is powerful. I also received a sweet letter from my Compassion child, Natacha, this week. She is now 8 and she writes the sweetest letters. They are in French and I can read/understand parts of it which is kind of cool because I feel like she and I are actually talking rather than me reading what someone else says she said. (Does that make sense?)

All in all, it's been a good week. A little peculiar at times, but still good. (Except someone keeps implying that I am grumpy. I think they are confused.) How about you? How is your week going?

Pour out your heart...

2011-07-23T21:58:00.004-04:00

I intended to write letters to two of my Compassion children tonight. As I sat down to do so, I realized that I really didn't know much about where my newest two were from, just the basic details provided by the Compassion packet. That's what makes search engines a wonderful thing. I've been checking out various sites, marveling at the pictures and the poverty levels and imagining the lives that my children are living. All was well, my heart was hopeful and I was thankful for the opportunities that we have to make a difference for them.

At least it was until I began looking up information on Burkina Faso.

Life in Burkina Faso is bleak.

It's one of the poorest nations in the world with little hope of changing it's situation. In the region where my child lives, one in three children die before the age of five.

One in three.

Oh, how my heart aches.

My beautiful Natacha is six. She's beat the first set of statistics. However, so many more issues/challenges loom before her. How I long to snatch her up and carry her to our home.

Instead, I pray for her, her grandmother who cares for her, and the Compassion workers who will guide, teach and minister to her for the next decade (God willing) of her life.

There are currently 52 children in Burkina Faso waiting to be sponsored through Compassion. If the Lord moves your heart, would you consider providing hope for one?

Get up, cry out in the night,
even as the night begins.
Pour out your heart like water
in prayer to the Lord.
Lift up your hands in prayer to him
for the life of your children
who are fainting with hunger
on every street corner.

Lamentations 2:19 NCV

busy weekend

2011-05-01T13:06:00.000-04:00

The skies cleared long enough for us to have several of the traditional Derby events this weekend: the balloon glow, the great balloon race, the mini-marathon and the marathon.

photos courtesy of the cj.

rainbow connection

2011-04-28T18:43:00.002-04:00

It seems that the rain has stopped. For a bit anyway. It was lovely to glance up and see a beautiful rainbow out just for me. (That's my story and I'm sticking to it.) Actually, I think this is the first rainbow I've seen since the two weeks of rain began. With all the horrific weather over the past 24 hours, I think I needed the reminder of His promise and provision.

But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.

gonna have to build me a boat

2011-04-25T06:44:00.002-04:00

This has to be some of our more unusual Derby weather ever. I think they said we got 4 to 7 inches of rain this weekend (on top of the 4 to 6 we'd already gotten) and are expecting another 4 or so this week. Next thing you know, we'll be having the Great Steamboat Race down Main street.

Kylene Lloyd, The Courier-Journal) April 21, 2011">

Kylene Lloyd, The Courier-Journal) April 24, 2011">

photos courtesy of the courier.

the city is still standing...

2011-04-17T09:52:00.005-04:00

although with the amount of fireworks going on last night, one might have wondered. As always, the Derby Festival put on a beautiful show. Last night's event was entitled Thunder Power and the theme was heroes and superheroes. The entire extravaganza used 52 tons of fireworks shells, 250 tons of launching tubes, 2 million pounds of sand, and 700 miles of wiring. Thunder was actually held a week early to avoid conflicting with Easter weekend. No wonder I thought time was flying! However, I heard the festival chairman say last night that there were at least 67 more Derby events before the big day! I wonder if anyone ever attends them all>

The first Saturday in May approaches

2011-04-16T20:20:00.003-04:00

It' hard to believe that it's that time again. Thunder time! Actually, it's the beginning of the Derby festival. Even though the weather's cold and a bit rainy and the Ohio River has flooded it's banks, taking some of the better viewing spots on the great lawn, still, the show must go on!

It's a bird, it's a plane...

2011-04-11T21:33:00.004-04:00

I am sitting on my bed, minding my own business when out of the corner of my eye, I see something white fly up in the air.

A moment passes...then, up it goes again, accompanied this time by a ferocious growling sound.

Another moment, another trip in the air.

It appears that the beloved basset has found a bevy of socks, clean, paired up and ready to be put away.

Well, they were paired up.

Now it looks like there's been a sock explosion at the foot of the bed.

And the beloved basset is exhausted from his efforts to liberate his little sock nation. He's building his nest and preparing for bed.

As for me, I suspect that after I locate and rematch all the "freed" socks, I'll be moving them to a higher perch.

2011-04-10T21:46:00.002-04:00

Do all basset hounds feel the need to "build a nest" before settling in for the night or is mine unique? (Perhaps spoiled is a better word.) At the moment he is less than thrilled because I am claiming my side of the bed. One can only imagine what kind of late night retribution he is planning.

I lift my hands

2011-03-13T01:50:00.000-05:00

And the peace of God, which surpasses every thought, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7

It's Alright

2011-02-16T17:39:00.002-05:00

This is my new favorite song.

I absolutely love the promise of it.

And after a few horrible days of watching Jonathan in constant, horrible pain, I need to hear the words. Over and over and over again.

It’s alright, everything will be okay
You just hold tight, I’ll be with you the whole way
When you’re weak, I’ll be strong
Keep going, we’re almost home
It’s alright, everything will be okay

Already?

2011-02-01T06:07:00.002-05:00

I was minding my own business Sunday.

Truly I was.

Sitting in bed, recovering from a flu-like thing, reading the paper

Checking out the Target ad.

Arguing with the editorial page.

Working my way to the front page of the paper. (I read the paper backwards because Josh reads it first so I get in a slightly different order than originally delivered. No big deal. Who wouldn't rather read the Target ad than the editorial page?)

So, when I finally got to the front page, what did my eyes behold?

DERBY COUNTDOWN BEGINS

Really?

Already?

Not that I'm not ready for a bit of spring, but I'm not sure I want to wish half the year away. Oh well, hang on to your hats, folks. Evidently it's time to start talking horse.

the month in review

2011-01-31T02:36:00.000-05:00

While I didn't post a lot, January was still a busy month at the heigh-ho house.

1. We celebrated the one year anniversary of this:

isn't she beautiful?

2. We adjusted to a school schedule again with the boy starting his second semester of college.

3. I took a "me week" of vacation. No real plans, no real desires. Just a few days to recover from the Christmas hustle and bustle.

4. finished fourteen books including this one which I am still pondering and planning to read again here.

5. counted 45 gifts (with plans to "count better" in February.)

6. Watched my husband paint our bedroom. =)

7. Enjoyed a visit from my brother and beautiful niece...and maybe saw the beginning of healing...

brother, niece and father checking out modern technology

8. Learned some scripture: Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds because you know the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish it's work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. James 1:2-5

9. Got a confirmed diagnosis from the geneticist for the boy. Nothing that wasn't expected but still a little disconcerting. No one wants to hear the term "wheelchair" when thinking about their 18 year old. He is, however, somewhat intrigued by the idea of a service dog. (And he asked about the possibility of a "service monkey." I told him I didn't think a service monkey could pick him up when he falls. So naturally he suggested a service orangutan.)

10. Kept on task with my daily scripture reading and finished Genesis and Exodus in the Amazing Collection. Learned a few things as well!

All in all, January was a good month. How could it be anything but? After all, my heart (and life) is under the Lord's control. He turns it any direction He chooses.

Relax

2011-01-20T05:53:00.003-05:00

re·lax - to reduce or stop work, effort, application, etc., esp. for the sake of rest or recreation.

I love days like today.

Days where I have nothing planned and nothing I have to do.

I have no appointments, no lists and no pressing tasks.

The house is reasonably clean (except for the never-ending muddy footprints left by 5 dogs and their endless journey in and out of the house) and the laundry is mostly done. The pantry is stocked and the fridge is full.

We are expecting a decent snowfall and I have nothing more pressing to do than watch it tumble down outside while I'm inside the warmth of my house.

I can spend the entire day reading and not feel guilty. (Which is a good thing because I'm finishing this and this and just got this in the mail yesterday!)

I can bake cookies, fix a big dinner, or take a hot bath and lounge around in bed all day.

The world is my oyster today.

And it feels good.

Remember

2011-01-16T09:02:00.003-05:00

Now this is what the LORD says— the One who created you, Jacob, and the One who formed you, Israel — "Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; you are Mine.
Isaiah 43:1

Held

2011-01-10T06:09:00.002-05:00

I have spent a great deal of time pondering the brevity of life lately. Between our next door neighbor dying suddenly in her sleep (she was about my age) to the horror that occurred in Arizona this weekend...there are no guarantees with life. And yet, we know that He knows the number of our days. And that everything happens within His Perfect Will. Nothing surprises Him or catches us unprepared.

A friend reminded me of this song yesterday and I think it provides a great deal of comfort.

something to ponder

2011-01-05T09:31:00.003-05:00

"True dependence is not simply asking Me to bless what you have decided to do. It is coming to Me with an open mind and heart, inviting Me to plant my desires within you."
~~Jesus Calling, January 5th

benign

2011-01-04T17:47:00.001-05:00

be·nign

–adjective

1. having a kindly disposition; gracious: a benign king.

2. showing or expressive of gentleness or kindness: a benign smile.

3. favorable; propitious: a series of benign omens and configurations in the heavens.

4. (of weather) salubrious; healthful; pleasant or beneficial.

5. Pathology . not malignant; self-limiting.

Praising God for good news!

Peace

2011-01-03T07:03:00.002-05:00

From today's reading:

Refresh yourself in the Peace of My Presence. This Peace can be your portion at all times and in all circumstances. Learn to hide in the secret of My Presence, even as you carry out your duties in the world. I am both with you and within you. I go before you to open up the way, and I also walk alongside you. There could never be another companion as devoted as I am.

Because I am your constant Companion, there should be a lightness to your step that is observable to others. Do not be weighed down with problems and unresolved issues, for I am your burden-bearer. In the world you have trials and distress, but don't let them get you down. I have conquered the world and deprived it of power to harm you. In Me you may have confident Peace.

May you find peace in Him today.

2011-01-01T06:37:00.001-05:00

For I know the plans I have for you" [this is] the LORD's declaration—"plans for [your] welfare, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.
Jeremiah 29:11

Anticipating the New Year...

Looking back

2010-12-30T04:48:00.002-05:00

As I read my Bible at the beginning of the year, a particular phrase seemed to appear with regularity. I don't remember noticing the phrase before, even though I'd traveled this particular road with this particular reading plan and this particular Bible for two previous years. The phrase was "hold fast to Him" and it appeared five times within a matter of days. Little did I know.

But God's like that. Revealing Himself in ways that we need, when we need it. And this has been a year of needing it. As adventure after adventure has presented itself to us, He's been there. Lifting, carrying, soothing, comforting, caring, loving. Reminding me who He is over and over again. And while my track record is far from perfect, I believe I've gotten a bit better at holding fast to Him.

A few weeks ago the boy mentioned that he was looking forward to an upcoming doctor's appointment because he had a few things to discuss with the doctor. Since the boy is no fan of blood work and so forth, I was somewhat surprised. When I finally had a moment to ask what these "things" were, he informed me that he had lost the peripheral vision in his right eye. About a month ago. Ack! When questioned as to why he didn't say anything he replied that he didn't want to worry me. Sigh.

Anyway, we went off to the eye doctor who pronounced his optic nerve "perfectly fine" and performed a visual field test. Which the boy failed. Twice. The eye doctor then recommended that we schedule an MRI to check for a brain tumor. Um, hello? I'm sitting there thinking blindness is the worst possible thing and all of a sudden you are using words like brain tumor? You know what I discovered? The words "brain tumor" cannot compete with the command to Hold Fast to HIM. During the next week as we waited for tests and results for tests, there were a lot of prayers lifted up. A lot of holding fast. And at the end of the week, we got the call. No brain tumor. We trekked off to the neuro-optometrist. Visual field tests re-administered. Three times. The boy passed every time. The "shade" was gone from his eye. He could see! God heals!

Here's the thing. As long as we are holding fast to Him, the outcome doesn't really matter. And while it might seem that it's easy for me to say because the answer was what we wanted to hear, there have been times this year when the answer wasn't what we wanted to hear. Wasn't what we hoped for. And for whatever reason, there are still a few "bumps" in the road to follow us into 2011. But GOD is still there. Lifting, carrying, soothing, comforting, caring, loving. Holding us up. Remember that. It's good stuff.

It is the LORD your God you must follow, and him you must revere. Keep his commands and obey him; serve him and hold fast to him.
Deuteronomy 13:4

Looking forward

2010-12-29T05:57:00.002-05:00

Each year about this time, I start to look forward toward the new year. I don't make new year's resolutions so to speak, but I do make plans. The past few years those plans have included how I want to be challenged and grow in the Lord. I want to be able to look back at the end of the year and see that my walk is stronger and hopefully my life is a tad bit more fruitful. =)

I've "loosely" made these plans for 2011 (I say "loosely" because God may have other plans for me this upcoming year.):

a) to read the Bible in historical order this year. Rather than read it in the order that it happened, I will be reading in the order that it was written.

b) to work through the Bible study the amazing collection as I read through the Bible. The Amazing Collection goes through the entire Bible and I think it's a good way to reinforce as well as doing an in-depth study of what I am reading.

c) a friend and I have committed to scripture memorization this year using Robert Morgan's 100 Bible Verses Everyone Should Know by Heart. We hope to memorize all 100 verses this year. (She's planning on learning some of them in Japanese as well. Go, Amanda!) I'm not sure if I am going to participate in the Siesta Scripture Memory thing this year. Since I will be learning more than 24 verses I might. I'm not sure what's holding me back from committing to it. I'll have to think about it. Actually, that's not quite true. I do know why I am hesitant. If I can work around it, I will.

d) I would also like to do some word studies on certain scriptures this year. My intent is to look into the original Hebrew and Greek surrounding verses containing particular words to get a better idea of what the Lord intended for us. (Perhaps my questions surrounding the Sabbath will finally be answered!)

At first glance, they seem like pretty big plans for the upcoming year. However, there are 365 days to work on them. And who knows how they will change my life. Looking forward...

2010-12-06T19:50:00.010-05:00

We are holiday people at our house. We will probably be adding decorating touches all the way up to Christmas as we keep dragging out our collections of Christmas things.

There are fluffy stuffed animals, pillows, ceramics, wreathes, candles, figurines and nativities galore scattered throughout the house, each competing for attention, each telling a story of sorts. But it's the ornaments that speak loudest to me...each one tells a story and I think (for the moment) I can remember how we got each one.

This was the first Christmas ornament that Josh and I ever purchased. It was our first Christmas together, 1986, the Christmas before we got married.

This little gingerbread girl was the "dated" daughter ornament the year that Jessi was born. Little did we know that she would grow up loving to cook and bake. I think this year, the first Christmas that she's in her own home, makes the memory a little sweeter. (no pun intended.)

This ornament came from a very dear friend at the end of a life changing journey, the year I first read the Bible chronologically. (For those of you who did the Esther study, this was a "peripety" moment.)

This figurine always reminds me of Jessi. When she was a little girl, she had long curls and I thought she looked like this little girl when she had her hair in a ponytail. When I found this ornament, I couldn't resist it! (Feel the sentimental tug at the heartstrings? Someone is missing her girl.)

Josh has been a Lilo and Stitch fan from the moment he saw the movie. (And he does a great Elvis impersonation!) This ornament was a perfect choice for him. (Our tree this year has a "Disney" section, a "star wars" section, a "Santa" section, a "penguin" section, a "Hawaii" section and a variety of others.)

Last year, LifeWay carried a series of ornaments that had Peace, Hope, Joy, Love and Jesus on them. Each one had a scripture on the back and they have become some of my favorite ornaments. I love the promise of Hope and Joy for the Christmas season and believe me, there are many days when I need the visual reminder right in front of my face.

There are others, too many to share here. Jonathan's apple he "made" in Sunday School his first Christmas. Ornaments from the year we decided to "make" our own. Ceramic ornaments that Josh has painted. Ornaments from family vacations. Memories I've forgotten until I unwrap each ornament. So tell me, what stories do your decorations tell?

My Jesus

2010-11-22T17:12:00.000-05:00

Oh my word...

a typical day in the life of...

2010-11-18T19:35:00.003-05:00

Josh has been out of town for the past few days. During this time, the boy and I have been hanging out together. A lot. (As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure he's glad his dad will be back tonight. ) Regardless, today was my day off and coincidentally, Jonathan didn't have any classes. So guess what? We spent the day together. (Just what any 18 year old wants to do!) We went with Jessi to the Speed Art Museum this morning. While the Speed is a "smallish" museum, it has several things that I love. The English Room is one of my favorites and I am absolutely fascinated by the things in the tapestry room. My favorite thing today was the George Grey Barnard sculpture of The Prodigal Son. Magnificent in detail, you could feel the fathers emotion at the return of his beloved son. Beautiful stuff.

Currently (besides counting the hours til dad gets home and he can turn me over to his father,) we are watching a Jurassic Park marathon. Well, we are mostly watching. I tend to leave the room whenever anyone is going to get eaten. Which means I leave the room a lot. However, when I am not covering my eyes and ears or "going to fold laundry", we've been discussing the various improbabilities in the movies and what we might do differently if we were currently being stalked by ravenous carnivores. Needless to say, step one would be never to go to an island where dinosaurs roam free. Hmmm...it appears that the latest victim is truly dino dinner so I guess it's time for me to head back to the movie. I hope you are enjoying whatever this evening brings your way!

The Power to Move Mountains

2010-11-17T15:25:00.002-05:00

My nephew has spent the better part of a year putting together a photographic study and documentary on mountaintop removal for The National Geographic Society. He's put some glorious examples of God's handiwork and some not so glorious glimpses of man's work here. As he puts it on his website, "This project does not seek to condemn those involved in the mining... it only seeks to promote wise stewardship of this planet so that its incredible resources are available for future generations. Questions are asked, sociological and ecological issues are addressed, possible solutions and alternatives are considered, and Appalachia is showcased in all of its pristine glory." The documentary will be out in January and I can't wait to see it!

cornbread, anyone?

2010-11-01T18:14:00.002-04:00

My husband says he's pretty sure God invented biscuits so there would be no need for cornbread. Needless to say, I heartily disagree. I have know idea where he gets these ideas...

2010-10-31T02:58:00.003-04:00

The LORD gives strength to His people;the LORD blesses His people with peace.

Psalm 29:11

Jessi is recovering quite nicely from her unexpected surgery. I appreciate those of you who offered up prayers on her behalf.

2010-10-30T12:48:00.002-04:00

You know it's been a long few days when you run the microwave and then realize you forgot to put anything in it...

blond moment, anyone?

Your Name

2010-10-03T08:36:00.001-04:00

Nothing has the power to save but Your Name.

2010-09-30T09:28:00.009-04:00

I love flowers.

I adore flowers.

Flowers make my heart sing.

Flowers make my heart leap with joy.

However, there are some flowers I can live without...

Anxiously anticipating the end of ragweed season.

Gratitude...counting the gifts

2010-09-27T01:28:00.000-04:00

Everything we do should be a result of our gratitude for what God has done for us.
Lauryn Hill

... dirty dishes--that I have dishes and a family that's been fed.

... open windows, a cool breeze, a certain crispness in the air.

... surviving my adventure with the stairs.

... the smell of blackberry cobbler baking in the oven.

... the anticipation of "fall" foods.

... unlimited texting.

... learning along with the boy as we study together. (He talks, I listen. Oh, how I am grateful that he still talks to me.)

"In our daily lives, we must see that it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but the gratefulness that makes us happy." ~ Albert Clarke

My own little world

2010-09-26T01:19:00.000-04:00

...what if?

Ordinary

2010-09-24T19:57:00.004-04:00

I am a contradiction sometimes.

Some days I find myself lamenting over the ordinariness of my days. Every day seems to be a bit of the same...get up, get ready (for what depends on the day and the mood of the various occupants of the house), get everyone else up, fix various forms of food, wash various forms of clothing, head off to work, head back home, fix more food, maneuver around the moods of the various occupants of the house, and do whatever else comes along with just living.

Then there are the other days. The days when I think about the "new normal." This certainly has been the year for it. First the wedding. Then the endless illnesses with all three various occupants of this house. The Graduation. More illness. Surgery. College. A Diagnosis. Learning to live with chronic illness. On those days I wonder where "ordinary" went. Not to worry though. More than likely, the next morning I will wake up, get up, get ready...you get the picture.

This week I've been thinking about the ordinary. Thinking about blogging and how I never seemed to think about anything to say when I was near a computer. How I missed blogging...even the mundane little tidbits that make up my life. I actually even thought about how the dogs hadn't done anything interesting or exciting to share on here as I've done in days past.

Until Wednesday.

Morning.

6:40 in the morning to be precise.

That was about the time that I decided to carry down a load of laundry to wash before leaving for work.

Apparently that was also about the time the "dogs race each other down the stairs" event was scheduled to begin.

Unbeknownst to me.

If only we'd had a video camera trained on the stairs. I'm sure I could have won the top prize on AFV.

Regardless, as I was swept from the top step to the bottom step in a matter of moments, laundry and phone still clutched in my hand, (perhaps it might have been better to drop one or both and try to stop my fall...) the irony did not escape me. Well, it escaped me until after I burst into tears, called Josh and told him that the dogs tried to kill me.

I did survive though. With a bruised thigh or two, a banged up elbow, sore armpits (which makes me wonder if I tried to flap my arms like a chicken and fly on the way down), and sore tops of my feet. (and what on earth is up with that? Did I try to hit the brake on the way down?)

Kind of gives me a new appreciation for the ordinary though...

He looks so innocent, doesn't he?

Gratitude

2010-09-20T01:18:00.001-04:00

"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has." - Epictetus

***the first tint of fall showing up in our trees...

***two letters from Amisha...

"Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul." - Henry Ward Beecher

***improvement from the boy's physical therapy...

***cooler mornings...

“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.” — Thornton Wilder

***Conversations with my father and my son...

***a heritage...

“Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.” — William Arthur Ward

***the opportunity to fix breakfast for both my children...

"To speak gratitude is courteous and pleasant, to enact gratitude is generous and noble, but to live gratitude is to touch Heaven." Johannes A. Gaertner

2010-09-18T10:21:00.002-04:00

2010 seems like the longest year.

Or maybe it is 2011 and no one told me. (Nope, that can't be true. If it were, we would be on another year of insurance deductibles and I'm sure someone would be letting me know.)

I think I've spent the biggest portion of this year in doctor's offices or hospitals or waiting for results from the aforementioned visits.

Anyway, after much contemplation, rumination, and excogitation, the doctors appear to have a diagnosis for Jonathan. It seems he has a type of Ehlers-Danlos syndrome. This accounts for the extreme pain in his joints, difficulty getting around and the falling/joints "giving way." While there is no cure, it can be managed with certain types of medication and physical therapy. He will also have regular tests done on his heart to see if there has been any change in the elasticity of the heart valves.

All in all though, it's not an insurmountable obstacle. He began physical therapy last week and the therapist is already beginning to see a strengthening of his tendons and Jonathan is beginning to see a lessening of his pain level. (a four instead of a six all the time.)

God is good.

And faithful.

We are grateful to have a diagnosis. We are grateful that, while not curable, it is manageable. We are grateful that Jonathan did not want to be a lumberjack or football player when he grew up. His life's ambitions are still obtainable even with physical limitations.

God is good.

Everybody falls sometimes
Gotta find the strength to rise
From the ashes and make a new beginning
Anyone can feel the ache
You think it’s more than you can take
But you're stronger, stronger than you know
Don’t you give up now
The sun will soon be shining
You gotta face the clouds
To find the silver lining

I’ve seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn’t ever end
Even when the sky is falling
I’ve seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That’s what faith can do

--What Faith Can Do by Kutless

The LORD is the strength of my life... Psalm 27.1

Peckish

2010-09-10T17:04:00.003-04:00

Dictionary.com defines the word "peckish" as "rather irritable." That mostly describes my mood today. I could offer reasons but that doesn't really excuse it.

So I'll be working on that the remainder of the day.

Because "peckish" is kind of like chicken pox. If I have it and allow it to come in contact with other human beings in the house, before long we are all itchy.

2010-08-06T17:06:00.003-04:00

Josh and Jonathan making a suit of armor out of duct tape.

I enjoy when my son and husband enjoy each other. Let me explain.

It's kind of strange. The boy is at an age where he and his dad don't have a lot in common. They each tend to go their own way, pursuing their own hobbies, forgetting (or so it seems) that they live in the same house. The father is up early, off to work, and falls asleep in his favorite recliner before it gets too late. The boy tends to sleep late (very late) and stay up late (very late.) There may be days when they don't see or speak to each other at all.

The last twenty four hours were different though. It started last night. The husband got a movie from netflix that the boy wanted to watch. (One of those dorky guy movies that I have no interest in watching.) Each time I passed by the tv room, there was laughter and talking and general frivolity had by all. Both men enjoyed the movie and the company. So this afternoon, rather than go their separate ways, they went and got hair cuts and picked out some of the boy's graduation presents. (He wanted a mini fridge for his room. To keep a pitcher of kool aid in. I should be used to this child by now but sometimes he still surprises me.) After their trip foraging around town, they came back and set up various pieces of equipment (there was a tv involved as well), still enjoying each others company.

Tomorrow they may go their separate ways again. The husband off to yard sale with his father (I think buying tires is on the agenda as well) and the boy will probably sleep til lunch time or later. But I will remember these moments and hide them in my heart...and I suspect that his dad will too.

Beauty

2010-08-02T12:58:00.007-04:00

I created beauty to declare the existence of My holy Being. A magnificent rose, a hauntingly glorious sunset, oceanic spendor---all these things were meant to proclaim My Presence in the world. Most people rush past these proclamations without giving them a second thought.

How precious are My children who are awed by nature’s beauty; this opens them up to My holy Presence. Jesus Calling-Sarah Young

"Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty;
the whole earth is full of his glory."
Isaiah 6:3

Give unto the LORD the glory due to His name;
Worship the LORD in the beauty of holiness.
Psalm 29:2 (NKJV)

How I'm spending my summer vacation...

2010-07-24T02:27:00.002-04:00

1. avoiding the heat. Oh my goodness, the Ohio Valley has been HOT this year. And since this is the Ohio Valley region, it's not content with just being HOT. It also must be HUMID. As in, an unsuspecting person can get dripping wet with sweat watering the gardens at 7:00 in the morning. IN THE MORNING! My solution to beating the Heat Madness is to pretend that we live in a cave, keeping all the curtains closed, washing clothes and running the dishwasher early early in the morning or very late at night and remembering the unusually mild summer we had last year. That and contemplating purchasing my very own snow maker.

2. Finding easy non-oven using recipes. The obvious solution would be to use the grill. However, the grilling man is not overly enamored with standing over a hot grill in the late afternoon when the heat index is around 105. I suspect if I were in charge of the grill, I would have similar sentiments. Instead, we are using the crock pot, the George Foreman grill and the car. (for carry out of course. Those poor little restaurant people already have to stand around a hot stove. Might as well enjoy their endeavors.) By the way, if you don't mind heating up the oven for a bit, these lemon raspberry bars are absolutely delicious!

3. Visiting various and assorted doctors. Because my goal in life appears to be to hit my maximum out of pocket deductible for the entire family. I keep saying that if that momentous occasion occurs, there are some things I'd like to get sucked and tucked. However, to be perfectly honest, I might be happiest at the thought of never seeing another doctor. Not that they aren't nice folks, I'm just tired of being poked, prodded and patient. I have never desired to be proficient in patience. (good thing because I don't seem to be anywhere close to mastering this particular fruit.)

4. Reading. And reading. And reading some more. I currently have a multitude of books scattered throughout the house and I have the best of intentions as far as reading them goes. I wonder how many I will finish while I am recuperating? Anyway, the titles include Appetite for Life, Julia's kitchen wisdom, The Vanderbilt era, Beguiled, In a heartbeat, The Southern Living Farmers Market Cookbook, Stuff Christians Like, Radical, the Percy Jackson and the Olympians series, Left to Tell, and The Price of Stones just to name a few.

5. Getting the Boy ready for college and wondering if we've taught him everything he needs to know. Granted, it's been a billion years since I attended college but I had no idea how much paperwork actually goes into allowing your child to attend college. I have a four page list of things that need to be done sometime before August 23rd or the Boy will be stuck at home. Currently his major is art history. I wonder if anyone else is as stunned as I am/was. When he told me he was trying to get into an art class, my first thought was that people pose "nekid" in those classes. No way is my baby taking anything like that. Fortunately he's not taking "that" class. His ultimate goal is to work in a museum. Since we have the beautiful Speed Art Museum right on the college campus, it seems like a logical step.

6. Recovering. I must be honest and say that 12 hours out, gallbladder surgery hurts. With a capitol H. Of course, when I consider that the surgery was just 12 hours ago, I have to think that of course it hurts. Why wouldn't it hurt? I mean, ouch! Somebody poked4 holes in you and sucked out a body part. If it didn't hurt then I might be a robot. Or a cyborg or some such nonsense. (which may be the vicodin talking instead of me. In which case it might be time for me to finish this little essay...)

At any rate, there's a glimpse into our lives this summer. And this list is by no means comprehensive. After all, I didn't mention the homegrown tomatoes, my first fair entry, house cleaning, working, or any of the other exciting adventures that make up every day life at the Heigh Ho house. Perhaps another time when there's not pain meds coursing through my happy little veins....

in the midst of chaos

2010-07-20T19:20:00.003-04:00

some of you might have gathered from comments here and there that this has not been the best of years for my health. Mysterious symptoms with no real discernible pattern have been a constant companion since February. My life has been interrupted more days than I can count. Plans postponed or canceled, life put on hold, anxiety and fear as constant companions.

Quite frankly, I am tired.

(in the interest of full disclosure, I will be sending my gallbladder to the land of misfit body parts on Friday with the hopes of alleviating a great deal of symptoms.)

However, last night was the last straw.

I had hives.

Lots and lots of hives.

I never get hives. (can't say that anymore, can I...) While I have allergies, they are to outdoor things. Or cats. They lead to red, itchy eyes, a runny nose, headaches and all other things associated with seasonal allergies. I do not get hives.

Especially hives so bad that my hives appeared to have hives. (we believe that I have now discovered a food allergy as well. As if I didn't have enough reasons to stop eating. Bleh.)

I was miserable.

Even the sight of a rainbow over the neighbors house (or blessed rain) couldn't lift my weary heart. And while I awoke this morning hive-less, my spirit was no less weary, my heart no less heavy. Don't get me wrong, I know I am blessed. I know that I am fortunate.

But this morning I was also weary.

Depressed.

Fed up.

Feeling abandoned.

Overwhelmed.

Filled with despair.

Just plain tired.

Have I mentioned that with all the chaos this year, I am behind in my scripture reading? Well I am. I picked up my Bible this morning and turned to the place where I should have been reading months ago and began to read Psalm 73.

Truly God is good to Israel,
to those whose hearts are pure.
But as for me, I almost lost my footing.
My feet were slipping, and I was almost gone.
For I envied the proud
when I saw them prosper despite their wickedness.
They seem to live such painless lives;
their bodies are so healthy and strong.
They don’t have troubles like other people;
they’re not plagued with problems like everyone else. (1-5)

At this point, I am nodding my head and thinking, "yeah. Why are their lives painless? Why is everyone else healthy and strong?" I read on:

I get nothing but trouble all day long;
every morning brings me pain. (14)

Can I get an amen? Then further:

Then I realized that my heart was bitter,
and I was all torn up inside. (ouch)
I was so foolish and ignorant—
I must have seemed like a senseless animal to you.
Yet I still belong to you;
you hold my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel,
leading me to a glorious destiny.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
I desire you more than anything on earth.
My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak,
but God remains the strength of my heart;
he is mine forever.

Those who desert him will perish,
for you destroy those who abandon you.
But as for me, how good it is to be near God!
I have made the Sovereign Lord my shelter,
and I will tell everyone about the wonderful things you do. (21-28)

I could have cried.

You know, He knew where I was going to be today.

That this day I was going to be hanging by a proverbial thread.

And He waited for me here.

With a comforting Word.

With the reminder of the promise.

I am His and He is mine.

Perhaps by the time I reach the end of this particular journey, I will be able to say that I have made the Lord my shelter and that I desire Him above anything else... I hope so.

Gratitude

2010-07-18T19:22:00.003-04:00

He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has. ~Epictetus

Counting everyday graces...

...good conversation

...the smell of lavender blooming

...the valley of vision

...a deep sleep

...the sound of rain hitting the skylight

...butterflies galore

...the first tomato from the garden

..."my heart and my flesh cry out for the Living God." Psalm 84:2

...a Pancake breakfast (with chocolate chip pancakes and peanut butter syrup.)

...a married daughter willing to come over early in the morning to eat her mama's pancakes.

Your cleansed and grateful life, not your words, will bear witness to what I have done. Matthew 8:3 (MSG)

Faith

2010-07-17T21:40:00.002-04:00

Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. Hebrews 11:1

2010-07-11T22:20:00.005-04:00

Compassionate Lord,
Thy mercies have brought me to the dawn of another day,
Vain will be it's gift unless I grow in grace,
increase in knowledge,
open for spiritual harvest.
Let me this day know thee as thou art,
love thee supremely,
serve thee wholly,
admire thee fully,
Through grace let my will respond to thee,
Knowing that power to obey is not in me, but
that thy free love alone enables me to serve thee.
Here then is my empty heart,
overflow it with thy choicest gifts;
Here is my blind understanding,
chase away its mists of ignorance.
O ever watchful Shepherd,
lead, guide, tend me this day...

Morning--The Valley of Vision

Yearn

2010-07-10T19:18:00.002-04:00

definitions

2010-07-10T18:36:00.003-04:00

Can I just say that the Lord has been working on me? (and isn't that a good thing?)

Three particular areas that we seem to be focusing on are obedience, gratitude and control. Hopefully as the days (who are we kidding? The way I've been lately, it could be weeks...) go by, I will share some of the lessons we've been working through together. (Also let me be honest and say that in no way have I conquered or mastered any of these things.)

Recently, as I spent some time in prayer, I told the Lord that I would try to have an obedient heart that particular day. No sooner had the words left my mouth when I felt a little nudge at my heart. It seemed as if the Lord was telling me that by using the word "try," I was giving myself an out to fail. Which led me to ponder the difference between "trying" and "choosing."

Dictionary.com gives the following definitions for the words:

Try:to attempt to do or accomplish, to make an attempt or effort; strive, to make a sincere effort.

Choose: to prefer or decide (to do something), to be inclined, Choose, select, pick, elect, prefer indicate a decision that one or more possibilities are to be regarded more highly than others. Choose suggests a decision on one of a number of possibilities because of its apparent superiority: to choose a course of action, The formal word elect suggests a kind of official action

Choosing seems to be a word of action. A decisive word. One that suggests intent. For example:

choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve...Joshua 24:15
Choose my instruction instead of silver, knowledge rather than choice gold...Proverbs 8:10

Here's the lesson learned. Each day as I get up, I have options. I can choose a Christ-like attitude or I can try to be positive. I can choose to have an obedient heart or I can try to be obedient. (Believe me, at my age, I know the obedient path whether I choose to walk it or not.) Just as I know that This is the day the LORD has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it, (doesn't that verse sound like a choice?) I know that making a conscious choice to be obedient (or kind or grateful or any number of other things) determines the outcome of my day. May He give me the strength and wisdom to continue to choose that which is pleasing to Him.

God bless...

my BIG BIG God

2010-06-13T09:09:00.003-04:00

Sometime around four months ago, something changed. For whatever reason I started having some unhappy health issues. At first I thought they were a temporary thing. An inconvenience but something that would go away. Only they haven't. Instead they have continued to make their presence known and have hijacked my life at most inconvenient times. (Is there ever a "convenient" time to be ill?) I've begun to refer to these times as moments of "meltdown."

Unfortunately, Monday was a meltdown day. Not a good day at all. However, after a day or two, I picked myself up and tried resuming my normal (whatever that is) activities. Life, after all, doesn't stop. Fast forward to Saturday morning. I was working on Saturday and was the opening manager. Imagine my unhappiness when I woke up with "that" feeling. I began to get ready for work, taking my medicines, moving slowly but surely, reminding myself that just because I wake up with "that" feeling does not mean that I am headed toward a "meltdown." Finally, I decided that it was safe to leave the house and head off to work. I realized that I had not read my devotion that morning. I am currently using Sarah Young's Jesus Calling and the past two days had been very comforting, beginning with the phrases "rest in me" and "trust me." As I sat on the side of my bed, praying that I was going to be able to make it through the work day, these were the words I read:

Let Me help you get through this day. There are many possible paths to travel between your getting up in the morning and your lying down at night. Stay alert to the many choice-points along the way, being continually aware of My Presence. You will get through this day one way or the other. One way is to moan and groan, stumbling along with shuffling feet. This will get you to the end of the day eventually, but there is a better way. You can choose to walk with Me along the path of peace, leaning on Me as much as you need. There will still be difficulties along the way, but you can face them confidently in My strength. Thank Me for each problem you encounter, and watch to see how I transform trials into blessings. Jesus Calling...Sarah Young...June 12th

The moment I read those words, it was as if a weight had been lifted from my heart. A measure of peace filled my soul and I laughed out loud. I left the house and headed off to work with a measure of comfort and joy that I desperately needed. My God loves me. Once again, He knew exactly what I needed to hear on that day. And He orchestrated the moment. For me. Is it any wonder that I love Him so?

sentimental journey

2010-05-21T19:54:00.004-04:00

I packed the last of the school lunches yesterday. It might be hard to believe that the thought of no more scrambling to find both a lunch box and enough food to feed a ravenous but picky teenaged boy might reduce me to tears. I however, am a sentimental fool. (I guess I should mention the last wearing of the chapel shirt which occurred this past Wednesday. Yes, I do notice things like that. However, I might rejoice at the last washing of the school uniform. And I'll be thankful that the shirts lasted the entire year without disintegrating into nothingness.)

The boy had a doctors appointment this morning so I dropped him off at school after we finished. Gathered outside (up and down some stairs) were many of the students that have accompanied the boy on his journey through school. (It was the Great Physics Egg Drop. Much hilarity and egg yolks ensued. The boy's egg survived with a "dent." ??? ) Looking at them all gathered there reminded me that I would not be seeing some of their faces again after next weeks graduation. I think that was one of the hardest things about Jessi's graduation as well. It's not just your child who is beginning a new chapter in life, all of their friends are beginning one as well. And while I might think of them as "mine", I'm not sure they see me the same way.

Anyway, I suspect the next few days will be filled with moments looking back and looking forward. For tonight though, here's to the last of school lunches...(although the boy did offer to let me continue making sandwiches for him.)

Dreams...

2010-05-19T12:42:00.003-04:00

Several months ago, my daughter introduced me to the concept of Glee. I'd heard her talk about it, of course. But since she'd used the same glowing descriptions towards the Office, and I found it's humor more awkward than funny, I just put her fascination with all things Glee down to a personal preference. However, one weekend when I was recovering from some ailment, I sat, mesmerized, watching all the episodes from the first DVD set. I was hooked. And now, even though I often disagree with the moral choices and so forth, I still enjoy the "show choir" music.

Last nights episode dealt with dreams. As in, the glee club dreams of their future...mostly dreams of stardom. Realistically, we know that everyone will not reach stardom but the point of the episode was that at this moment in time, they still had dreams. Big dreams. A hope for their future.

I've spent the last few months thinking about dreams. Circumstances this past year have forced us to reevaluate and let go of certain dreams we've had. In all honesty, there have been days where I've feared that these dreams were dead. Gone. Never to be seen again. And when that dream belongs to your child, it's a hard thing to face. Because you want them to have everything they hope for.

However, here's the thing I've discovered. I don't control my child's future. God does. And my God already knows the path, the obstacles, the adventures ahead. I found this little graduation statue at LifeWay recently and the base that the little grad dude stands on reads, "They will soar on wings like eagles." That's a promise/dream/prayer this mama can wrap her hands around.

And as for my child....I'll be reminding him to rest on this:

I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. (Jeremiah 29:11 MSG)

2010-05-11T06:52:00.002-04:00

I put this together last year but the sentiment is still true today. Happy birthday baby!

in case you're interested...

2010-05-01T12:00:00.005-04:00

First, I have to say that I have no inside information. I don't have a clue about stats, track condition and any other "formula" used to predict Derby winners. (I do know that when the track looks like it does today, anything goes and often a long shot wins. Some horses just don't like getting their feet dirty.) Anyhoo, I often choose my horses by their color, their name, their jockey, their story, or their silks.

That said, these are my picks for the race:

"Line of David"...need I say more? This Bible study girl couldn't think of a better horse to win than one with a name full of promise.

Let me preface my next pick with a few comments. I am a big girl. Not so much hefty (although heftier than I ought to be with my recent obsession with chocolate) but I am tall. When my husband and I were first married, I asked him to carry me up the driveway. His response was a no and honest to pete, these were the next words he said, "You're not exactly petite."

Trust me, 23 years later, I still remember.

In his defense (and his ability to think quickly), he insists that petite means short.

Whatever.

Anyway, the filly in the race is named Devil may care. Her owner said this about her this morning, "When you look at this filly, she's not going to look like some dainty looking little thing. She's good sized, a big, strong filly."

So from one "not petite" girl to another, all I have to say is, "you go girl." And after she's won this race, maybe she'll drop on by and step on that man's foot. Then she can go get her some chocolate.

it must be derby...

2010-05-01T07:26:00.004-04:00

if you are seeing this around town...

The Oaks (yesterday) featured a "pink out" (hence all the pink hats.) Churchill Downs donated a dollar for each admission to the Susan G Koman for the cure Breast Cancer Foundation. Rumor has it that it was a record crowd of 116,046. Woo Hoo!

because everyone needs a bit of insanity now and then...

2010-04-26T18:02:00.002-04:00

During Derby week, our fair city hosts any number of events to get people "in the mood" for fun. We have balloon races, rat races, foot races, waiter races and, of course, horse races.

One of the stranger races occurs this evening at Broadbent arena with the Stockyards Bank Great bed race. The event actually began this morning with a pajama party where the bed-racers could hang out, tailgate and show off their creative bedmobiles. Then tonight they will compete in various levels of bed-racing. In addition to crazy costumes and outlandish bedding, the "fun" division of the race will feature a group of physically challenged hand-cyclists (including world champion and paralympian Greg Hockensmith) whose bed will be bolted to four hand-cycles.

Believe it or not, there is actually a "serious" racing catagory as well. Apparently the competitors in this category can make it around the 600 foot track in less than 30 seconds. In this case (and so many others during Derby week), a picture (or video) is worth a thousand words...

up up and away!

2010-04-23T07:04:00.005-04:00

The Derby Festival Great BalloonFest began last night with the balloon "glimmer" and tour. The "rush hour" balloon race should take place this morning if it isn't cancelled by rain. (Each year I find myself questioning the wisdom of flying a herd of balloons over rush hour traffic. I'm fairly certain there will be a few traffic accidents attributed to watching the balloons instead of the road.) Tonight they will have the balloon "glow" down at the fairgrounds. (There is a difference between the "glimmer" and the "glow" but for the life of me, I'm not sure what it is. They both look like hot air balloons glowing in the dark.)

Finally, the balloon fest will end with the "great balloon race" (not to be confused with the "balloon tour" and the "rush hour race.") Last year, 34 "hound" balloons chased the "hare" balloon across the county. The object of the race is to drop a bag of bluegrass seed on a giant "X" chosen by the hare balloon. Last years winner came within 11 feet of the target.

if it were a garden, it would be full of weeds...

2010-04-21T11:29:00.001-04:00

I have been most neglectful of my poor little blog. I'm not sure why, other than I'm still trying to find my footing after Jessi's wedding.

Oh, and I guess we can throw in the millions of medical issues past, current and future (would you believe that I am the only one who has not spent some time in a hospital since the first of the year?)

And then there's the little game we are currently playing called, "will he or will he not graduate?"

All of which has left me somewhat at the end of my rope. (never mind pesky little things like one boss leaving, another one coming, inventory and so on.)

All in all, life is good. We are surviving and sometimes even thriving. And I miss writing. So perhaps I'll find my way over here a bit more frequently. Here's hoping!

2010-04-18T07:54:00.002-04:00

Once again, if you are a fan of fireworks and crowds, then this was the place to be last night.

Let the Derby festivities begin!

2010-01-31T18:38:00.002-05:00

Give thanks to the LORD, call on his name;
make known among the nations what he has done.

Sing to him, sing praise to him;
tell of all his wonderful acts.

Glory in his holy name;
let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice.

1 Chronicles 16:8-10

wedding abstracts

2010-01-28T06:37:00.010-05:00

I've always enjoyed the quirky little abstract pictures at weddings. I hope you do too...

more wedding fun...

2010-01-25T22:19:00.009-05:00

Saved!

2010-01-24T12:34:00.002-05:00

I am saved by Your Mercy
I've been transformed by Your love.

You're my glory
and the Lifter of my head,
Strong Deliverer,
You'll fight my battles in my stead;
You will preserve me by Your mercy...

Hallelujah, I am saved!

A Word...

2010-01-20T09:33:00.001-05:00

"Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin..."

Zechariah 4:10

2010-01-07T06:48:00.005-05:00

Apparently the cat began an exercise program in 2010.

It appears that the aforementioned exercise program involves running up and down the stairs in rapid succession.

While yowling.

At three o'clock in the morning.

Gee, I wonder how he has the energy to get through his busy day.

Oh, that's right. His busy day consists of this:

and this:

sigh. Goofy cat...

Well...

2010-01-04T17:14:00.002-05:00

...I didn't cry.

At least not before or during the wedding.

I did cry (a little) when we got home that night and I went into her room and started washing and packing the rest of her things. And maybe I cried just a little when the dogs kept looking for her and I had to keep telling them that she wasn't there.

And I probably cried when I read the letter that she left for me telling me that she loved me and that she missed me.

I also cried when I drove to the wedding boutique this morning to take back the tuxedos. I've driven this route five times in the last seven days and every day but today she was by my side.

I didn't embarrass her by weeping and wailing as she walked down that aisle. Walked with beauty and confidence to the man who is her future. But I sure thought about it.

Looks like we made it!

2010-01-02T18:11:00.003-05:00

2010-01-02T07:13:00.002-05:00

need I say more?

on the fourth day before wedding bliss...

2009-12-29T06:35:00.001-05:00

...I am wondering.

Since I was able to check several things off my "must be done" list, why does it appear to be as long if not even longer today?

wedding countdown...

2009-12-28T08:18:00.004-05:00

Well, I had intended to be more diligent in chronicling the countdown to Jessi's wedding. However, it is now days away. Six days if we count today. (and believe me, I need to count today.) Today's list of must do items include 12 things. So, I'd better head out of here and see what I can accomplish.

I must be crazy.

2009-11-21T16:24:00.003-05:00

The man-child is growing up too fast.

I can no longer see the chubby faced baby in his whiskered face or hear his sweet voice in the deeper pitch of adulthood. The happy smiles of his toddlerhood have all but disappeared in the moods of a teenaged man-child.

And I miss him.

Which may be why I cherished a few moments from this morning.

Sometime yesterday evening, the flu beast made it's presence known in the body of my boy. After a long night of cool cloths, prayer, hand holding and soothing words, we headed off to the doctor-him with blankets and a fever of 103 and me with scriptures to pray, a box of kleenex and a bucket (just in case.) As we sat, waiting, he asked, "can I lay my head on you, mama?"

And so we sat, him with his head on my chest and me stroking his head, kissing his hair, whispering a prayer.

And I cherished the moment.

Because mostly he is 6'2. Too tall, too old to call me "mama". To let me kiss the top of his head and offer a mama to lean on. To tuck him into bed and bring him a drink of water. To sit by him while he sleeps and offer up prayers for the man he's becoming.

So yes, I may be crazy, but today was a moment to cherish...

LPM Scripture memory verse

2009-11-15T13:27:00.000-05:00

2009-10-28T06:23:00.000-04:00

It was spirit week recently. On Career Day, The Boy decided he wanted to go as an undertaker. (actually, he looks a bit zombie-ish, doesn't he? Or maybe he looks like someone who wishes his mother would put the silly camera down.)

canine capers

2009-10-27T06:20:00.000-04:00

I can't decide if they are making sure dad can't go anywhere or they are annoyed that he's in their chair and they're trying to make him move...
(I guess he doesn't have to worry about that leg getting too cold this winter.)

Gratitude

2009-10-25T10:23:00.004-04:00

I was having one of those mornings recently. No clean school clothes, (yes there were. Just not the ones he wanted to wear.) why wasn't breakfast ready, the biscuits are too brown, the cars parked in the wrong order, the lightest of rain...not enough to water anything but certainly enough to provide curl in my hair where no curl should be, running behind for work, driving behind a school bus...thinking of of the chaos left at the house, knowing that the mess would still be there when I returned home for lunch. Normally I pray on the way to work but on this particular morning, the only words that left my heart and lips were, "show me Your Glory, Lord." My soul was too weary to utter anything else.

As I turned to the right, I noticed a most glorious sunrise on display before my eyes. Vivid pinks and oranges. And I tried to be grateful for the display of His handiwork before me. Really, I did. I found myself thanking Him for the picture He provided...but there was a small part of my heart that muttered, "I've seen sunrises before. Yes, it's beautiful...but it's nothing new."

And on I drove.

Somewhat ashamed of my less than grateful spirit.

But still wallowing in my weariness.

More traffic. (because I left the house a few minutes late.) More sighing.

But then...

I noticed something smack in the middle of my windshield.

A tiny bit of color.

I peered closer, not sure what the little splash of red might be.

As I watched, it seemed to expand. And as it did, I began to smile. The color grew longer...bigger...and I had to laugh...with tears in my eyes.

Because right in front of my face, where I couldn't possibly miss it...God gave me a rainbow! It's been years since I've seen a rainbow and here was one, just for me. I could almost here Him saying, "So the sunrise didn't impress you? Well, here my child...take a look at this. Here is My Glory..."

My heart sang. My spirit was refreshed. And I was grateful.

Won't you take a moment and share what He's done for you lately?

gratitude

2009-10-05T20:19:00.008-04:00

Your cleansed and grateful life, not your words, will bear witness to what I have done.
Matthew 8:3

Counting these blessings over the past days...

The last of the plumeria blooming beautifully...(before they head off to their winter home in my mother-in-law's spare shower.)

three (!!!) lemons on the lemon tree...

a man-child who still has some boy in him...(I came down to breakfast to find dragons battling it out on the counter.)

Possibly the last blooms from the tropical garden Josh put in this summer. (since we are not tropical climate dwellers, most of the garden will be dug up to be replanted next spring.)

freshly laundered quilts and blankets as we prepare for cooler fall nights...

Won't you consider joining the gratitude community and offer thanks for your daily blessings?

smiling...

2009-09-24T19:24:00.002-04:00

Words like "small bulges in two of his discs" and "signs of arthritis" might not normally make a mother smile.

Unless they are preceded by "no signs of cancer" and "no spinal tumors."

So, we keep doing what we are doing.

Praying and resting.

(and we'll add praising to the list as well!)

Honestly, I suspect that a certain 17 year old boy doesn't mind resting a bit every now and then. (and I'm pretty sure he doesn't miss garbage detail either.)

Peace

2009-09-17T16:56:00.003-04:00

This has been a unique summer. (Did we even have a summer? I seem to have missed it.)

At the end of the school year, (a lifetime ago) Jessi was dealing with some health issues. Several trips to the doctor later, a diagnosis was given, medication prescribed and off we went, waiting for life to return to normal.

Only...it didn't.

Little did we know, the medication prescribed causes feelings of anxiety in people who don't normally deal with anxious feelings. For people who battle anxiety, it unleashes a tidal wave of endless panic attacks.

So we spent endless weeks fighting unseen demons as we waited for the medication to work it's way through her system. Words cannot do justice to the trauma of four or five panic attacks a day, literally confining her to her room as the only place of real safety. Finally, towards the middle of July, she began to return her normal routines.

Just in time for Jonathan to go to the doctor for his constant back pain.

The initial diagnosis was/is a fractured vertebrae. Huh? (We're still not sure how that happened.) He ended up being fitted for a back brace and we settled down, anticipating a return to normal.

Silly me.

A week passed. Then, Jonathan stopped eating. We've been through this a few times before. Three years ago he became ill for a time and lost 30 pounds during the summer. (He has some reflux issues and hates to throw up. The easiest way to avoid that is to stop eating. Not.) At the time he was getting a bit "fluffy" and the first ten pounds lost weren't really a big deal. By the time he lost the entire 30, he was underweight and extremely skinny. Several doctors visits, food adjustments and some medication later and he began to eat...not enough to gain weight, but enough to not lose weight. In the years since, we have had a few "episodes" but we have kept them under control and everything was fine.

Until the end of July.

He couldn't/wouldn't eat, drink or sleep. From Friday until Monday.

Saturday night, I started forcing him to eat ice chips every 20 minutes so that he would stay hydrated. We did not sleep. He did not sleep. He could not leave his room or even his bed. (It was during this time that his sister began to read to him.) Finally, when Monday morning came, off we went to the doctor. By this time we were sure that this was an anxiety issue and that he could starve himself if we weren't careful. Fortunately, the doctor was able to find the right dose of anxiety meds for him and he slowly began to return to "normal."

At least everything but his back did.

School started. We obtained two sets of textbooks so he didn't have to carry them back and forth to school. He wears his brace and doesn't bend or lift. Yet still there is pain.

Pain when sitting too long.

Pain when standing too long.

More pain than there should be considering the length of time that he's had the injury.

So today we went to have an MRI.

To look for defects in his spinal column.

(Of course, during all of these months we've also been immersed in planning a wedding.)

Then you can throw in a trip to the ER Sunday morning (it was after midnight so it must have been morning) with the bride-to-be who was certain that she was having a heart attack. (She wasn't. She was having a pleurisy attack. Which, while uncomfortable, is certainly much better than a heart attack.)

And I'm still waiting for our return to "normal." Except I'm beginning to think that maybe this is the new "normal."

But that's okay. God has been with us every step of the way. We have found comfort in the written Word, in scripture memorized, in prayers prayed. And we are blessed.

"For He Himself is our peace..." Ephesians 2:14

LPM Scripture Memory Verse 18

2009-09-16T09:24:00.000-04:00

never forget...

2009-09-11T01:21:00.000-04:00

2009-09-07T08:35:00.006-04:00

Sometimes I wish I could drink grace, mercy, and compassion (or at least a little verbal discretion) the same way you'd drink a morning cup of coffee. I have a feeling it might make the day a little smoother...

2009-09-03T21:30:00.002-04:00

Weeks ago, when he was so very ill, she began.

Sitting at his bedside, she read to him for hours. The sound of her voice, the characters brought to life, distracted him from illness as nothing else could. He began to look forward to the ritual, even as he began to heal.

Nightly he asks, "will you read tonight?"

Nightly, as I sit in the kitchen, I hear their voices echoing down the hall. Laughter fills the room.

I think she looks forward to the reading as much as he does.

They converse, he and she, about things other than the book they are reading.

Talking about school, friends, life. Nurturing the roots of their relationship.

I wonder if they both long for this time together as the day of her leaving grows closer.

And perhaps not just my mother's heart recognizes the swiftly passing days...

LPM Scripture Memory Verse 17

2009-08-31T21:32:00.003-04:00

anybody else want or need a heart to know Him? I'm claiming this one as a promise I want to see fulfilled...

2009-08-21T08:16:00.004-04:00

There's something bittersweet about watching your man-child head off to school with all the usual "guy" stuff--sideburns he hopes no adult will notice, shirt tail hanging out, backpack tossed carelessly over one shoulder--and a big yellow gift bag with artfully arranged tissue paper (courtesy of his sister) concealing carefully chosen birthday gifts for his girl.

Where does the time go?

Sunday

2009-08-16T07:48:00.002-04:00

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the Word,
Ephesians 5:25-26

May each of us allow the Word to cleanse us this day...

LPM Scripture Memory Verse 16

2009-08-15T07:11:00.000-04:00

2009-08-14T19:56:00.002-04:00

Remember this?

Now she looks more like this...

last time I saw her, she slept. And slept. And slept. Apparently all that sleeping is good for growing tiny puppies into much bigger puppies. She's still a doll, though.

we'd probably prefer locusts...

2009-08-11T10:31:00.002-04:00

You'll be happy to know that there's a possibility of flash flooding again today. That's on top of the flash flooding/heavy downpours from yesterday (not to mention the flooding from last week.)

(courtesy of the CJ)

I'm trying to remember that we usually are paying to water our lawns/plants/trees this time of year. (Remember--thorns have roses.)

One Thousand Gifts...a Journey

2009-08-10T06:25:00.005-04:00

Some people are always grumbling
because roses have thorns;
I am thankful
that thorns have roses.
Alphonse Karr

Like most, there are days when I struggle to have a grateful heart. Some days seem heavier than others. However, I'm coming to believe that on those days, finding that which I am grateful for is a gift, a day brightener of sorts. And truthfully, as I review the day, I often find it wasn't as heavy as I thought.

This week my list includes:

a prayer of thanksgiving that no lives were lost during our "surprise" flash flooding...
(picture courtesy of the weather channel)

heartfelt prayers of dear friends as I took the boy to the doctor on Monday...

blessed sleep...

sounds of laughter coming from a room that hasn't had much laughter recently...

cupcakes!

the comfort of a well loved Bible...
(if you can't see the words, they say, "Then you will call and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help and He will say: Here am I.)

much needed vacation days...

the hope of accomplishing things around the house...

more wedding plans...

the antics of our pond frogs...

What are the "gifts" in your life recently? Won't you consider writing them down and sharing them?

Sunday

2009-08-09T01:54:00.000-04:00

You're blessed when you stay on course,
walking steadily on the road revealed by God.
You're blessed when you follow His directions,
doing your best to find Him.
Psalm 119:1-2 (MSG)

waiting for the locusts...

2009-08-05T07:48:00.010-04:00

You may remember our visit with hurricane Ike last September. Or perhaps our epic battle with the white blanket of death in January? Well, apparently our tango with weather anomalies is not over. Yesterday we had a brush with "flooding of biblical proportions." (weather channel's phrasing, not mine.) Two storms brought up to nine inches of rain to our fair city. (6 inches fell in one hour, setting a new record. Yippee!)

The basement of the main library downtown flooded. Unfortunately, it contained the server for all the libraries computers, the computers for the newest branch (set to open Monday), new books, reserves that were shipping out to other libraries and countless other items.

These are the bookmobiles. Obviously they have some issues as well.

An apartment complex close to the book store was struck by lightening during the storm. Fortunately, no one was hurt but these apartments were completely consumed.

This is the race track at Churchill Downs. Fortunately there's quite a few days before the first Saturday in May.

Flooded streets...

Flooded businesses...

However, I guess if you can't beat the rain, you might as well drag out the kayak and make the best of it.
I hope you are staying dry where you are!
(pictures courtesy of the CJ & weather channel)

One Thousand Gifts...

2009-08-03T01:11:00.000-04:00

I've pondered this thing called "gratitude" as I've begun my my list of a thousand gifts. I sought the definition of gratitude and had to smile at the footnote that instructed me to "see grace." (Is that not the truth?) When I searched here, I was delighted to find this instruction from our Lord in the Message--"Your cleansed and grateful life, not your words, will bear witness to what I have done." I need no other encouragement. I want my life to be one of gratitude that reflects and honors Him...I want others to see Him through His work in my life.

These were just a few of the things that I've been grateful for this past week:

...for the care of an older sister as she reads to her younger brother late into the night, hoping to bring him some comfort as he wrestles with illness.

...for the delicate shades of color as a new plant blossoms in our little corner of the world.

...for the comfort of knowing that believers are praying as we struggle through a difficult time.

...for a husband who enjoys creating beautiful things and spent days creating a tropical garden in our not-so-tropical backyard.

...for family who comes to our aid when we have no idea how to unclog an air conditioner line or fix a broken part on a car or caulk a bathtub.

...for unusually cool days this July. I've seen so many glorious skies, uncluttered by the sweltering heat and smog that normally smothers us this time of year.

...for Isaiah and the fact that his love and obedience of God outweighed his fear of what man would do to him as a prophet. Each year as I read through this book, I see so many beautiful pictures of the God who pursues us that I cannot help but be grateful. (and hope that I too might be just as obedient.)

Won't you take a moment today and write down the gifts He has blessed you with? It just might change the way you see your life...

Sunday

2009-08-01T22:59:00.003-04:00

My soul yearns for You in the night;
in the morning my spirit longs for You.

Isaiah 26:9

LPM Scripture Memory Verse 15

2009-08-01T02:47:00.000-04:00

Sunday

2009-07-25T22:00:00.004-04:00

The Lord, my God, lights up my darkness.

Psalm 18:28

since we speak wedding at my house...

2009-07-23T20:45:00.009-04:00

...when Kelly said that she'd be doing wedding dresses on "show us where you live Fridays", I thought I'd see how my dress has held up over the years. Twenty two years to be exact.

My mom made my wedding dress. I remember going to the fabric store downtown because the regular fabric stores didn't have fancy lace and fabric. (and I still remember how much the lace cost and how shocked my mom was at how expensive it was.)

I saw the dress in a bridal magazine while I was doing mission work in California and we found a pattern that was fairly close, with princess poofy sleeves and lots of buttons. Lots and lots of buttons.

There are thirty three buttons down the back and fourteen buttons down the sleeves. Teeny tiny buttons. Fortunately, I have small hands. Unfortunately, I couldn't button the back of my dress up myself.

Mom also fixed the veil as well. Some sort of crown thing that was popular during the eighties. I think it was meant to sit on the head and not mush down enormous hair.

I'm not sure if you can tell it here, but I was thin when I was young(er.) um...maybe thin isn't the word. I was skinny. I measured the waist tonight and it measures 24 inches. I'm happy to report that I measured one of my thighs and it's not as big now as my waist was then. Almost but not quite. Don't as me why I torture myself with things like that. In my head, I think that I should still be that thin. However, 22 years of birthin' babies followed by lots of pie and cheese fries have not been kind to my waist. (They have, however, been more beneficial to other parts of my figure...if you get my drift.)

Anyhow, the dress is all tucked away again. Maybe someday I'll drag it out and show it to my grandbabies. Far far down the road.

shoes and tiaras and veils, oh my...

2009-07-16T07:38:00.008-04:00

My sister-in-law and niece are visiting for a few days so we thought it would be fun to go to the wedding boutique and show them Jessi's wedding dress. We hadn't "officially" tried it on since it came in and I hadn't had the chance to see Jessi's shoes.

It looks like Cinderella, ready for the ball...

What little girl could resist trying on all those tiaras and veils?

imagining her turn...

warrior princess...

delightful...

dreaming...

(and no tears for me. I was so busy trying to figure out how to lace up the gown, I didn't have time to cry.)

LPM Scripture Memory Verse 14

2009-07-15T06:58:00.001-04:00

2009-07-12T11:17:00.003-04:00

How did we get from this...

to this...

so fast?

2009-07-12T09:45:00.002-04:00

My eldest child has been dealing with some major anxiety issues over the past few weeks. If you have never had any experience with panic attacks, they can be difficult to understand. The best explanation I've heard puts it like this. It's like your brain tells you that there's a tiger in the room with you. Your eyes can see that there's no tiger but your brain continues to process adrenaline like the tiger is actually there. For a multitude of reasons Jessi's anxiety has loomed large and vicious these past few weeks. Some days she has been unable to leave the house and has struggled to even leave her room. We have diligently battled the beast and she is making progress toward a normal life again though. One thing that has gone a long way in soothing her spirit has been the Word.

I have become a huge believer in the power of memorized scripture. Until this year, I'd convinced myself that my brain was too old to remember much of anything, let alone something as complicated as the Word of God. Fortunately, Beth invited us to join her in a journey of memorizing the Word. And what a beautiful journey it has been. Words cannot express the comfort I have received from carrying the Word engraved on my heart and mind. Whenever my spirit grows troubled or restless, I can flip through my mental notebook and whisper His Words to my heart. When Jessi calls me in a panicked state, I can give her scriptures that bring healing and comfort. And best of all, she too has learned that His Words bring a healing balm to an anxious heart. (She carries a small notebook filled with scriptures with her everywhere she goes.)

Life is complicated. We may encounter things everyday that are unexpected, overwhelming, difficult, traumatic, hurtful or frightening. With God's Word, we can be prepared to face these moments. I cannot encourage you enough to hide His Words in your heart. (Trust me, if my "overstuffed with fluff" brain can memorize, you can too.)

Be prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it's all over but the shouting you'll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You'll need them throughout your life. God's Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other's spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out. Ephesians 6:13-18 MSG

2009-07-09T18:14:00.004-04:00

My eyes are tired.

It's amazing how old I can feel on very little sleep.

The good news is that the Boy seems to be back to normal.

So we'll pack up our heavy duty industrial strength Lysol for another day.

And after fixing dinner, cleaning up from dinner, heading to the library, then my mother-in-law's and my mom's, heading back home, washing a load of towels, and feeding some dogs, perhaps I'll head off to bed.

Assuming my brain doesn't turn to pudding first.

2009-07-09T02:11:00.002-04:00

There's something magical about 2 a.m.

That's the hour when my almost adult teenager's voice sounds more like the child when he doesn't feel quite right. (Of course, that's when my diagnosing skills are at their most bizarre as I throw the first 47 diagnostic questions at him. I wouldn't be surprised to hear myself tell him it's just PMS, take an ibuprofen and go back to bed.) Regardless, here we sit. Waiting. Hoping. And trying to pretend that the workday does not start again in just a few hours. Sigh.

A gift...

2009-07-02T20:17:00.009-04:00

The right word spoken at the right time
is as beautiful as gold apples in a silver bowl.
Proverbs 25:11

Cool things I've run across recently...

an absolute truth from Shannon...

a statement from Sandy...

a lesson from Annette...

a caution from Jon...

something beautiful from Ann...