Thursday, December 30, 2010

Looking back

As I read my Bible at the beginning of the year, a particular phrase seemed to appear with regularity. I don't remember noticing the phrase before, even though I'd traveled this particular road with this particular reading plan and this particular Bible for two previous years. The phrase was "hold fast to Him" and it appeared five times within a matter of days. Little did I know.

But God's like that. Revealing Himself in ways that we need, when we need it. And this has been a year of needing it. As adventure after adventure has presented itself to us, He's been there. Lifting, carrying, soothing, comforting, caring, loving. Reminding me who He is over and over again. And while my track record is far from perfect, I believe I've gotten a bit better at holding fast to Him.

A few weeks ago the boy mentioned that he was looking forward to an upcoming doctor's appointment because he had a few things to discuss with the doctor. Since the boy is no fan of blood work and so forth, I was somewhat surprised. When I finally had a moment to ask what these "things" were, he informed me that he had lost the peripheral vision in his right eye. About a month ago. Ack! When questioned as to why he didn't say anything he replied that he didn't want to worry me. Sigh.

Anyway, we went off to the eye doctor who pronounced his optic nerve "perfectly fine" and performed a visual field test. Which the boy failed. Twice. The eye doctor then recommended that we schedule an MRI to check for a brain tumor. Um, hello? I'm sitting there thinking blindness is the worst possible thing and all of a sudden you are using words like brain tumor? You know what I discovered? The words "brain tumor" cannot compete with the command to Hold Fast to HIM. During the next week as we waited for tests and results for tests, there were a lot of prayers lifted up. A lot of holding fast. And at the end of the week, we got the call. No brain tumor. We trekked off to the neuro-optometrist. Visual field tests re-administered. Three times. The boy passed every time. The "shade" was gone from his eye. He could see! God heals!

Here's the thing. As long as we are holding fast to Him, the outcome doesn't really matter. And while it might seem that it's easy for me to say because the answer was what we wanted to hear, there have been times this year when the answer wasn't what we wanted to hear. Wasn't what we hoped for. And for whatever reason, there are still a few "bumps" in the road to follow us into 2011. But GOD is still there. Lifting, carrying, soothing, comforting, caring, loving. Holding us up. Remember that. It's good stuff.

It is the LORD your God you must follow, and him you must revere. Keep his commands and obey him; serve him and hold fast to him.
Deuteronomy 13:4

3 comments:

annette said...

I've thought of you so many times this year, and I know only a little of what you've been through. You do hold fast to Him so sweetly. Your heart is dear to Him. So thankful for Jonathan's healing! I believe God answers prayers and hears our deepest longings. Sometimes it is easier to sing His praise when He moves in the direction we so desire, but I know you well enough to know you'd also say, "Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him." He's your God and your trust is contagious. I love you and I've never met you! Much blessing in the coming year. Things are looking up or we are. Hopefully both!

Anonymous said...

Karen,

What a great word of encouragement!
What a testimony of God's comfort and care.

In case you don't see my reply comment on my blog...please know that I am praying for you and please let me know the outcome.

Hugs,

Helen

Abba's Girl said...

Wonderful testimony and praise report. I join you in praising our Father God!