Saturday, February 14, 2009

no second chances...

Her father is a practical man.

He tends to see a job or event as a challenge and begins to plan for it. Over the past few days I have watched as she and he have discussed table rounds, linens, centerpieces, flowers, cakes, and all sorts of wedding paraphernalia. They've stood with their heads together, comparing renting versus buying, the proper placement of whatnot, and so forth and so on.

As they've drawn closer together, I feel further apart.

Distanced.

Because while he sees her wedding as something to tackle, I see her this way...



Still my baby girl.

And I realize that a chapter of parenthood is closing.

While I am excited for her, my heart longs for the little girl who wants to be sung to sleep, read to, comforted...

sigh.

It's times like these when I think we should of had ten or twelve children...

(this whole feeling was re-emphasized last night as I sat in a parking lot at midnight, watching a young man walk toward my car. As he got closer, with his dress shirt untucked, his tie taken off and a swagger in his step, I realized that someone had snatched up my baby boy and replaced him with this person. Then, in the car on the way home, listening to him mention a certain young lady several times, it dawned on me that his transition is almost complete as well.)

8 comments:

hello jessi! said...

A swagger?
Ewwww.

You can come read to me at work if you want.

Traci and Scott said...

You're killing me. I'm getting ready to grab my 9 year old and force her to let me read to her! Thanks for the reminder that the time just goes too fast.

Hope you had a great anniversary!!

Traci

Lori - The Simple Life at Home said...

Aww, you made me tear up! I can't imagine being where you are - my kids are still my babies, you know. I about had a heart attack when Emily slow-danced with her crush last weekend. Marriage? Aaackk!! The dress looks lovely though. You must be very, very proud. :)

Abba's Girl said...

I sit here in tears...thinking back to 1996 when we took my husband's daughter to Austin to move into the dorm...the house was so quiet, I wept for 2 weeks...after the 1st Christmas break, we both thought we want her here but we want the quiet that we are now used to again....

Love, Annette

Ang baylis said...

My good friend's daughter is getting married. She feels exactly the same as you. I know it's a normal part of life, but it must be hard. I'm the same as you, too. I think of my kids just like they were when they were 2 and 3 years old! I'm praying for you as you accept this new chapter. You're ahead of me, so you'll have to let me know how to handle it! I can't imagine.

Thank you for the birthday card! And... thanks for disinfecting it first! :)

Love you,
Angie xoxo

annie's eyes said...

I know your mom's heart on this. It is not just a smooth transition, but intermittent ripping apart of the heart. So many steps, so quickly. Your tender heart touches mine daily, Karen, as you walk through this independence thing...I still sing "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be."

Jules from "The Roost" said...

2 of my 3 daughters have gotten married in the past 3 years! Isn't it hard! It does get easier! :)

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