Saturday, April 12, 2008

the swimsuit chronicles part one

I must confess that I did not go swimsuit shopping Friday night. I "mysteriously" acquired a headache that prevented me from all travel. Alas, I was unable to mysteriously (and convincingly) acquire any ailment this evening.

Prior to embarking on our lovely adventure, Josh took me out to eat. It's always better to have one's fluffiness fully "fluffed" out when one is going to be trying on a swimsuit. After all, we want to make sure that we are getting the right size. One that covers all "size" fluctuations.

After much stalling and much eating, we finally arrived at swimsuit purgatory. Obviously, with it being late in the swimsuit season, there were not a lot of choices to choose from. I found two styles that I thought I could live with and headed back to the dressing room. (I must confess at this point that for some twisted reason, I felt compelled to keep my hiking boots on while I tried on said swimwear. Always the fashion queen, that's me. And don't ask why I was wearing hiking boots. I came straight from work.)

Anyway, I discovered the first problem almost immediately. Some evil, sick person had mixed the junior and women's sizes together. Can I just say that LG for juniors does NOT mean the same as LG for women. Perhaps if said woman wanted a hanky or a sock or something. But definitely not to cover every square inch of ones person. So selection number one was out. Because I was never really in it. Parts of me were. But definitely not all of me.

So I tried on selection number two. The bottom half looked lovely if I do say so myself. (even with hiking boots.) The top, however...um...I guess I never realized I had so much...cleavage. Perhaps the top came with some extra. I don't know.

For some strange reason, I happened to have my digital camera in my purse, so after much twisting about, (no, I am not posting the picture.) I snapped a picture of the top part to show to Josh. Because I don't really trust my judgement about such things. (hiking boots with a swimsuit. need I say more?) He agreed that it was a little too revealing. The aforementioned picture has now been deleted. Thank goodness.

So, we went off to buy some cinnabons. Nothing like drowning your swimsuit miseries in a few pounds of sugar. I'll worry about swimsuits another day. Like maybe next winter. After I've shed a few pounds. (I don't think I'll get away with waiting that long. After all, I have a date with a beach in my future. So I suppose I will have to try again. And again. And again.)

2 comments:

connie said...

I understand what you are going through, at this weight I don't like bathing suit they are evil, it just reminds how much I have to lose :(...
On a brighter note I finished your painting, I didn't put the light house in it but you can all ways dream... If you would like me to do a Light house one for you all you have to do is get me a canvas and I will do one...
See you tomorrow...
Connie
GBU

MJ said...

Once again you have made me laugh heartily as I read your blog. I could only imagine how hiking boots complemented your ensemble! I admire your courage for at least attempting to find a swimsuit. Could you have subconsciouly been telling the swimsuit to "take a hike"???