Wednesday, January 21, 2009

what I wouldn't give for a bowl of oatmeal...

I feel I have been most neglectful of my blog lately. It's not that there hasn't been anything going on in my life. It's not even that there has been too much going on. There's been the normal amount of ridiculousness, stress, excitement, drama and trauma. I guess it's more a matter of not being a very good steward of my time. (It's certainly not that I have been too busy to write because I have cleaned my house from top to bottom, organized everything I own into little plastic drawers, lost fifty pounds, found a cure for the common cold and knitted an entire wardrobe out of recycled plastic bags. Although I did wear a dress out of a garbage bag once. But that's another story.)



Anyway, I decided to have a totally random post, filled with totally random things...if I can think of anything.



1. It is COLD! It has been COLD. I think it plans on being COLD until Derby day. Which, for the record, I find totally unacceptable.



2. Basset hounds have very COLD noses when it's COLD. And they like to stick them in very inconvenient places.



3. We are being visited by a "lesser poobah" at work today. (my bosses boss as opposed to my bosses bosses bosses boss.)



4. If you don't fill a Yorkie's food bowl when HE wants you too, he will shoot the bowl across the hardwood floor with his paw like a professional hockey player hitting a hockey puck. (They seem like such small dogs. Don't let the size fool you. They are very demanding creatures.)



5. Life rule number 6,782: Never leave parrotlet food on a table where larger dogs can see it. Because the larger dog will snatch it off the table and run upstairs with it. He will then proceed to shred the bag and eat as much of the seed as he can get into his big stupid mouth, leaving behind little bitty pieces of plastic as evidence of his crime.


6. The aforementioned rule is somewhat similar to rule number 5,496 which says not to leave bowls filled with Christmas candy on anything lower than the fourth shelf of a book case. Because everything else is just about chin level for the same stupid dog.



7. Yorkies can also flip their dog food bowls upside down so that they look like they are playing the shell game on the Price is Right. I'm fairly certain that I wouldn't want any of the prizes that they might choose to leave, though.



8. Dirty dishes seem to be multiplying like bunnies in my kitchen sink. It's somewhat reminiscent of Christmas time except there are no cookies or pies or cake or any other goodies to compensate for their presence.



9. This has not kept me from developing my winter layer of fat though. You'll be happy to know that once again I am storing up enough blubber to keep myself (and a small village in Outer Mongolia) warm.



10. Which is a darn good thing, because it's COLD outside!

Believe it or not, this is a picture of a real dog. (I know it looks like a fuzzy slipper.) This is Ivan the grumpy Yorkie.

3 comments:

Abba's Girl said...

My parents owned several Yorkies when I was growing up and then I had one after I got married. They are entertaining and opinionated and yes Karen, they will leave gifts when annoyed...we had one who remembered 1 year later where dad had thrown a piece of cookie the year before on vacation. She shot out of the car like a cannon ball and ran into the forest to look for it.

Have a great day at work.

Love, Annette

Michelle V said...

Too funny!!!

Blessings
Michelle

Anonymous said...

You're sense of humor is great! You make ordinary life a grand adventure which encourages me!
Thanks for the laughs!